Enough whining already…

So I came home from work today and my wife asked me what I did. I told her that I stuck a tube in a man’s penis, injected contrast and took some pictures. Then I stuck a tube in this guy’s rectum injected contrast and took some pictures. Then, I put a caulking gun in a woman’s anus, injected barium paste and watched her defecate. (And, of course, took some pictures.) She then said “ugh, I could never do it”. And that was the end of the conversation…

It was a great day at work, though. The schedule was light, we had some interesting cases and we finished nice and early. Tomorrow we have MSK conference. That’s a little nerve racking. The attending can make you feel really dumb. I am going to have to cram some fracture eponyms tonight.

After reading my last 2 posts, I realize that I am complaining a lot. I don’t want anyone to get the wrong impression.  I am absolutely grateful to have made it as far as I have and to be a radiology resident at a great program. There were many times along my path to this point that I thought I would never get here. But I do use this blog as therapy, so there is going to be some bitching now and then.

I think if I wasn’t a resident, I would want to be Andy Samberg. Him and his friends are hilarious:

Indecisive like Jason Mesnick

Ok, I admit it. I watched The Bachelor finale last night. Pretty much all 3 hours of it. Granted, I was going through the UVA High Res Chest CT tutorial while it was on, but I still witnessed the utterly dramatic flip flop that Jason pulled in front of all of America (all while Ty was taking a nap). You won’t remotely understand that last part unless you watched. Sorry.

jason

So 3 hours in radiology resident free time is like an eternity. Just think of how many pages of Brant & Helms I could have read in that time. No wonder I didn’t know the answer to the question asked of me in conference today: What percentage of lung if contused is prognostic of requiring mechanical ventilation… 40%. People who read instead of watching The Bachelor know the answer to those kind of questions…

So I stepped away from my GI rotation today to substitute in the chest reading room. I read like 50 x-rays. Painful. And I couldn’t wear scrubs. At least I didn’t get peed on.

So as another outlet for my bottled up creative energy besides this blog, I am filming a documentary at work. I get footage in our 15 minutes of free time after conference before we are expected to return to the reading rooms. I do short interviews using the Flip my brother got me for being his Best Man. As you can imagine, with only 15 minutes a day to get footage, the project is progressing slowly. And people are anxious, but I keep telling them that these things take time. I am pretty sure that they all think I am crazy. I don’t really fit into the mold that all the others fall into. Instead of roaming the halls with an open book in my hand (one 4th year does this all the time) I am thinking about my next t-shirt design, the next footage for my documentary and making a beer pong table. (We are going to have a tournament next month, if I can get some plywood). Perhaps this is why I am feeling a little stifled by residency. Don’t get me wrong, I like interpreting images, but it can’t be the only thing in my life. I think this is why I will never be a truly great radiologist. This is hard to swallow. At least I don’t have a Schatzki ring.

Check out my t-shirts and mugs here.

Here is a sample design:

darkside

Irony is getting run over by an ambulance.

I had a realization over the weekend that radiology residency is just not cutting it for me. (Maybe I should consider surgery?…:) I am constantly having feelings of longing for something more in my life. And when I sit down to really think about what is missing, I come to the conclusion that I have no outlet for creativity other than deciding whether I will use the word “normal” or “unremarkable” in my reports. I need more, a lot more. So MedJester is back and starting fresh. God it feels good to refer to myself in the thrid person!

I started blogging a few months ago and ran out of steam after about 9 posts, but this time it’s going to be different. (I think the Buffalo Bills said that a few times in the 90’s.) But I’m serious this time. I need this. It gives me a platform for all of the items I put aside in my mind throughout the day that I think others might find amusing. Because the most valuable thing in the world is a good laugh. Laughter makes you happy, keeps you young, lowers your cholesterol, increases your sperm count, etc…

For example, I got peed on today. Totally sprayed, and not by a cute little clean smelling baby either. A full grown not so clean smelling adult. You got to laugh about that… The resident I was working with got a huge laugh out of it. I guess they don’t call it a voiding cystourethrogram for nothing. But you know what I say, “When it comes to imaging, VCUG’s always come out number one!”

So in noon conference today, our lecturer asks “What is the most common location for gastric lymphoma?” And then proceeds to tell us it’s the stomach…

As I used to, because I am a money grubbing whore, I will plug my medical T-shirt and mug site like I used to.

www.cafepress.com/medjester

And leave you with this brand new design in honor of my favorite album of the 10th grade The Chronic. (You can get it on a t-shirt or mug at the link above.)dre